The Good Dog Life Blog — The Good Dog

Leaving Your Dog Holding The Emotional Bag

By Sean O'SheaOne of the best ways to create an anxious, hyped-up, destructive, barking, whining, howling, crate-breaking, separation anxiety filled dog, is to share an effusive goodbye.Even when you leave without fanfare, it's already hard on your dog. They're likely already somewhat worried and concerned...worked up emotionally.So the last thing you want to do is make something that's already difficult for your dog...a thousand times worse.The tendency for us is to want to connect and communicate to our dogs. We want them to know we love them. That we're coming back. That we're sorry. That everything will be okay.And that's exactly how you make everything not okay.Even though the intention is 100% positive, the actual outcome for the dog is the opposite. They're left feeling confused, worked up, excited, emotionally stimulated. And then - you leave.Then they're left with all the emotional elevation, and nowhere to put it. The contrast, from what you just shared, to what they're now left with is enormous. And that energy and stimulation you created has to go somewhere. So it goes into all the negative stuff I described above.You basically leave your dog holding the emotional bag. Your intentions were to calm and soothe, but what they created was suffering and overwhelm.I know that's not what you want. And it's not what your dog wants either. Trust me.If you really want to help your dog feel better. If you really want your dog to not worry. If you really want you dog to relax while you're away, then don't load them up with physical and emotional juice prior to leaving. Just leave. Just make it as normal and non-eventful as possible. Just be neutral. Just go.Understand that what you're trying to convey isn't landing the way you want, and it certainly isn't creating the positive, comforting reaction you desire. Understand that if your heart is wanting you to reach out and soothe, make sure your brain overrides it. Understand that as connected as we are, certain communications get severely lost in translation.Even though your human heart may feel cold and uncaring by just leaving, your dog won't receive it like that. His or her feelings won't be hurt, they won't think you don't love them, and they won't hold an emotional grudge. On the contrary, you'll actually be helping them. Helping them to feel more comfort, more calm, more relaxation, and more acceptance of your departure.And that's what you really want. :)

CONNECT WITH US ON Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and YouTube for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!Our groundbreaking, game-changing dog training book The Good Dog Way: Love Them By Leading Them is now available for order! Click HERE to order your copy!CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE BOOK TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogApril 26, 2017

Taking Pictures In Therapy

By Sean O'SheaTherapy. It's a messy, uncomfortable, and often painful process. We all know going in that there's a good chance of tears, overwhelm, panic, uncertainty.A therapists gig is to help you dig down into the muck of your experiences, trauma, and pain, examine it all, process it all, feel it all, and then, by giving you new tools and support, hopefully help you move on in the most healthy fashion possible.Lots of folks avoid therapy because it's hard and often painful. It's much easier to distract ourselves with all manner of "stuff", and hope it will all be okay.But if you're willing to dive in, be vulnerable, and do the work, amazing things can happen. But there's no escaping the hard work, the discomfort, pain, and the challenge of the process.Do we always look happy in therapy? Are we always smiling and laughing? Is it the most fun point of your day? Probably not. Is it the most beneficial part of your day...probably.People in therapy are often found crying, trembling, overwhelmed and freaked out as they attempt to navigate their interior world.Breaking old patterns, finding new insights and awareness...all good stuff...good stuff that doesn't always look so good.I see rehab with dogs in much the same way I do therapy for humans. Are their differences? Of course. We can't have the same verbal conversations and we can't communicate emotions and best approaches for forward movement in the same way. But, are we working through trauma, anxiety, toxic patterns and beliefs? Absolutely.So knowing all that, why on earth would we expect a dog, who's going through major transformational stuff, to always look happy? Why would we expect these complex creatures to just happily, easily, and seamlessly adjust to their entire worlds changing? Shouldn't we expect some emotional fallout? Shouldn't we see some therapy-like discomfort and overwhelm as they attempt to navigate unchartered mental and behavioral waters?This is what always perplexes me. Folks want dogs to be trained and rehabbed and transformed...but they don't want the dog to have to experience any discomfort or uncertainty as they do so. They want the dogs to magically transform and skip all that nasty, not fun stuff. People freak out if they see a dog shaking as it lays in place or looking unsure or afraid. Even though all that's been done is that the dog's pattern's been blocked, or it's in a new environment, or it's simply not being allowed to act out as usual.The patterns being broken create temporary stress and anxiety. The dog, finding itself in unfamiliar territory is freaked out...just like the person on the couch in the therapists office. But even though we get it for us, we struggle seeing it with dogs.Of course the goal of therapy, or training, isn't to keep the human or dog in a state of discomfort and anxiety or stress. It's meant to be a gateway to the opposite - more comfort, less anxiety, less stress. But that takes time and growth. And neither species gets a free pass or a shortcut.And while it might be hard to watch dogs in an uncomfortable state, if we can see them in a deeper fashion (emotionally, pattern wise, trauma bearing etc.), and understand that they too have to go through difficult stuff to come out on the other side, we might just be able to see things a little differently.We see this arc of shock, confusion, adapting, processing, and growth constantly. It's not always pretty, and it's not always "done" by the time the dog goes home. Many dogs need months of continuous work to finally reach their comfy, happy, easy space. This is why some folks remark that dogs in our program don't always look "happy". I'm okay with that, I don't love it, just like I'm sure the therapist doesn't love seeing people in pain, but I do appreciate it, because I know it's leading the dog somewhere.Somewhere far better than where they were when they showed up.So the next time you see a picture or video of a dog being trained, and if the dog doesn't look ecstatic and bouncy, take a moment, learn what the dog came in with, what's being worked on, and maybe you'll be able to see that he's going through a process, a transformation. One that's unfinished.

thegooddoglifeblogMarch 23, 2017

Losing By Religion

By Sean O'SheaIf you're lucky enough to be unfamiliar with the current friction in the dog training world, let me ruin that for you. :)There's an approach that goes by various names. It might be called pure positive, force free, or rewards based. The concept is simple: for dogs, life and learning should always be 100% fun, comfortable, and enjoyable. You reward the behavior you like, and ignore the behavior you dislike. No tools or approaches that might impinge on 100% fun, comfortable, and enjoyable should ever be used. Anything that makes the dog uncomfortable is labeled inhumane.It's purported to be "scientifically based", extremely modern, and highly evolved (even though it eschews 3 of the 4 learning quadrants science accepts.) It's a new and better way to learn. Consequences, and all that nasty stuff the rest of us creatures learn by, are all unnecessary. It's incredibly popular, has the best built-in marketing (who wouldn't want to just use treats and love to create good behavior?), and has a near-religious, cult-like following among its devotees.The only issue is, it doesn't really work.Let me clarify. It works really, really well to teach certain things. If you want your dog to "know" how to sit, down, place, recall, beg, roll over, shake, or do any number of behaviors or tricks, it's awesome. But there's a rub. There's a big difference between "knowing" and reliably performing something. Your dog can "know" all day long and still not do...especially when you need it most. Also, there's the little matter of it not working at all to teach what is absolutely NOT okay - dog aggression or human aggression, reactivity on leash, resource guarding, jumping, counter-surfing, poop eating, just to name a few.In other words, it's a great yes, but a terrible no.But, if you listen to the devotees, they'll tell you it does it all, with any dog. It creates absolutely reliable recalls...even around squirrels and other dogs. It creates awesome, non-pulling walks, eradicates reactivity on-leash, stops jumping, fixes human or dog aggression, and makes resource guarding a thing of the past. And all without any of those nasty tools, or having to be "mean" to your dog.So we've got all these claims of awesome results, all done in a loving, kind, aversive-free fashion. There's mountains of books, DVDs, workshops, and websites, all claiming amazing results and help for those in need. We've got trainers swearing they can do seriously amazing rehab with seriously tough dogs. We've heard legendary tales of truly nasty aggression being turned around. Heavy-duty reactivity issues totally sorted. The most challenging behaviors, and all of it better handled and better solved. And once again, all achieved without those damn tools, consequences, or leadership stuff.I mean, come on, that's amazing. That's like dog trainer rockstar stuff. That's the stuff that changes the world...or at least the industry. That's the stuff you can't wait to see in action. The stuff you can't wait to witness and cheer on.Except...When you go to find it, to cheer it on...you can't. It's not there. All that awesomeness has been misplaced, or tucked away somewhere. Maybe it's so awesome that you need to join a club or get some private access code?It's a head scratcher for sure. Where is it all? Why can't you find all this great stuff. Surely the folks who have this knowledge can't wait to capture it on video and share it with the rest of the world. Surely they want to help dog owners and other trainers see this great stuff so they can all make more evolved, more enlightened decisions. Right? If you truly loved dogs you'd want everyone to have access to this great information. Right?But alas, when you go searching, it's nowhere to be found. Not the serious stuff. Sure you can find videos of cupcake dogs, purported to be "serious" at one point, that were never really a challenge doing great. But all that heavy-duty stuff? Crickets.And that's where you have to ask some hard questions. If this approach is one devised by dog lovers, who only want the best for dogs, and if this approach is truly revolutionary, why would those with this information and ability keep it to themselves? Why would dog lovers rob other dog lovers who are struggling? Why would they keep something so helpful, for so many, a secret?And you really only have two possible answers. One, they don't care enough about dogs and owners to share what they know and how they do it. Or two, they can't do what they say.Or maybe there's a third. Maybe it's both. Maybe the only true priority is the agenda, the religion. Maybe dogs and owners aren't the priority at all. Maybe real results and real caring aren't the North Star of this religion. Maybe this religion is about something else altogether.Maybe this religion is actually more about rescuing broken people by way of rescuing dogs. The dogs, their owners, and their issues aren't the focus. They're the window dressing. They're the camouflage used to distract from the true motive of the religion: the practitioners attempting to heal or retroactively protect themselves by way of protecting dogs, from what they see as parallels of their own disempowerment, lack of boundaries, and coping with what they didn't desire in their own lives.The dogs, the owners, the truth, don't matter. All that matters is that that nagging pain within subsides.That's the religion.

thegooddoglifeblogMarch 6, 2017

Relationship Gaps And Unforeseen Consequences

By Sean O'SheaWhat most folks don't get, is that everything with your dog is connected. Every allowance or permissive moment, opens the door for another, seemingly unrelated behavior. They don't realize that over-indulging your dog with love, freedom, and tons of unearned affection, creates perceptions about you that can lead to other issues. That everything you do or don't do is giving your dog information about who you are and how he should respond to you. That you're constantly dropping clues to your dog about what opportunities are available, as well as creating openings for instability.When your relationship with your dog is lopsided, unbalanced, and based far more on "love" and spoiling than it is rules and structure, you're going to have problems. (I think we all get that by now.) But the interesting part is that you never know how that information of permissiveness, allowance, and lack of accountability will show itself.You think the spoiling might lead to begging or barking at you, but instead it leads to resource guarding. You think that allowing the pulling on the walk might lead to barking at other dogs, but instead it leads to growling and snapping at guests in the house. You think allowing jumping, barking, and craziness in the house will just lead to bad manners, but instead it leads to separation anxiety.While the origins of these serious issues might seem dramatic and improbable, I can assure you we've seen them all in action. We've seen relationship gaps create what seem to be amazingly disconnected issues. The thing is, you don't get to choose how your behavior (or lack of) affects your dog's. You don't know what's going to come out the other end of a relationship that's short on leadership, rules, and accountability, and long on chaos and permissiveness.Oftentimes it makes clear sense. The behavior you think you're possibly creating (and are ok with) is what you get. But just as often it's not. Often the dog's individual psychological makeup and personality create an outcome you'd think was totally unrelated. But what happens is, your dog's personal insecurities, temperament, genetics, and attitude become a giant mixer - a mixer that combines with what you add to it. You both add your parts, stir them up with daily life and repetition, and voila, you get some nasty behavior that SEEMS totally unrelated. But it's not.We see so many dogs with gigantic laundry lists of issues. From annoying stuff to super dangerous. And the funny thing is, our program almost never changes. But all these dogs, with all these different issues, using the same program, transform. Do we sometimes need specific protocols for specific issues? Of course. But by and large, a simple program of believable leadership, non-negotiable rules, dependable structure, and accountability for poor choices are what make 95% of the changes.Do you know how many resource guarders stop guarding once they experience a few rules totally unrelated to their guarding? Or how many territorial guys stop being territorial once believable leadership is in place? Or how many separation anxiety dogs relax and stop freaking out once they learn that structure, rules, and accountability are prioritized over freedom and affection?Leadership gaps, rule gaps, structure gaps, accountability gaps - accompanied by permissiveness, affection, and freedom are the perfect recipe to create all manner of dog behavior problems. The thing is, you never know which ones.

thegooddoglifeblogOctober 5, 2016

Is Your Dog Too Smart For Training?

3z7a0957 By Sean O'SheaRelationships are real things. You and your dog have one. It might be healthy, balanced, and awesome, or it might be toxic, disrespectful, and disheartening. Or maybe it's somewhere in-between. Whatever it is, it's been built by your interactions. What you've allowed. What you haven't allowed. What you've asked for. What you've reinforced. Who you've been and how you've behaved.Everything you've done has been information your dog has used to determine your relationship. All this information has told your dog who you are and what role you wish to play in his life. It's also informed him about the rules of life. What is and isn't okay, what is and isn't expected. It's created the framework your dog makes all his decisions from.While trainers can teach your dog commands, manners, and what is and isn't acceptable behavior, your dog is simply too smart and too emotionally evolved to take that information as universal. Just like you know who means business and who doesn't in your own life, so does your dog. Eventually, if you don't keep up the work, if you start to slack, your dog will see the cracks. He'll realize there's two sets of rules: the ones he knows, and the ones you actually enforce. And he'll choose the latter. Not because he's a bad dog, but because he's opportunistic...just like you and me.Like us, when authority and rules are foggy, or not consistently enforced, we tend to take advantage of them. Whether we like to admit it or not, it's always consequences - or the possibility of them - that tends to keep us on our best behavior. The more predictable and dependable, the better our behavior tends to be. And of course, the less predictable and dependable, the worse our behavior tends to be.Our dogs are reading us. All the time. What are we enforcing, what are we allowing? They're taking this information and deciding what needs to be adhered to and what doesn't, who needs to be listened to and who doesn't. If you ask for less than what the trainer asked, you'll get less. If you ask the same, you'll get the same. It's in these moments that you create your relationship dynamics.And while us trainers can build the foundation for the new, more healthy patterns and choices to stand on, it's only you - the person your dog lives with, the person who enforces the rules, structure, and expectations daily - that can make these changes permanent.We can only give you the tools to start you on the path, we can't build the relationship. That part, the hard part, is up to you. Your dog is too smart to have it any other way.

thegooddoglifeblogSeptember 27, 2016

Abusing Dogs

By Sean O'SheaWhile typically we associate the abuse of dogs with denying them food, shelter, or physically harming them, the abuse I see in my work is far more common, insidious, and acceptable.Why insidious? Because it's abuse that is shared under the guise of love, caring, or just a lack of knowledge.So many owners mistakenly associate leadership (creating a framework of rules and expectations), structure (daily habits, routines, patterns), and accountability (consequences for breaking known rules, or making poor choices in general) with being mean, nasty, and harsh. These owners just want to love their dogs - which is code for selfish/lazy behavior.But here's the thing, the only mean, nasty, or harsh thing is denying our dogs the framework and foundation they need to thrive and lead healthy, happy lives.Owners who decide to forgo leadership, structure, and accountability are basically sentencing their dogs to a life of stress, anxiety, worry, over-arousal, uncertainty, pressure, and way too much responsibility.And the dogs we see that live like this are every bit as abused and unhealthy as the more obvious and accepted forms.What would you call constant stress when it's avoidable? Constant anxiety when it's avoidable? Constant worry when it's avoidable? Constant over-arousal when it's avoidable? Constant pressure when it's avoidable? Constant responsibility when it's avoidable?I'd call it abuse.Of course no one is hitting the dog, starving the dog, or leaving the dog out in the snow. These dogs likely have the best food, tons of "love", and a nice cozy bed(s) to sleep on. And yet, they're emotional wrecks.If we allow dogs to be emotional disasters (which looks like chronic barking, possessive behavior, separation anxiety, hyper-reactivity, growling/lunging at triggers, maniacal on-leash behavior, maniacal indoor behavior, aggression etc) when we have the ability to change that and offer them something far better, isn't that abuse?If we allow our dogs to suffer when there are methods, approaches, and tools that can change all that, isn't that abusive? Isn't allowing suffering the same as causing suffering?Now, if you're hard at work with a challenging dog, or you're working on turning a toxic relationship around, this isn't aimed at you. You've got my full support. But if your dog is a wreck, and you prefer the easy, comfortable, lazy (or worst yet, chosen ignorance) approach to "dealing" with this, then this might be for you.Abuse comes in many packages, and the package that is most pervasive isn't the horrible, nasty, or unbelievable - it's the every day, socially acceptable, loving, spoiling, allowing, permissive stuff that's doing the most damage.Remember, love isn't about doing what's easiest and most fun/comfortable/emotionally enjoyable for you. It's about doing what's best and healthiest for those in your charge - even when it's hard or uncomfortable.

thegooddoglifeblogSeptember 7, 2016

The Ten Commandments Of Dog Training And Ownership (Do!)

3Z7A0190 By Sean O'Shea1) Thou shall only pet, soothe, and share soft energy with a dog when they are in a healthy and positive state of mind. We learned in The Ten Commandments Of Dog Training (Don't!) that sharing soft energy or soothing interactions with our dogs when they're in an unhealthy state will likely reinforce and strengthen the unwanted behavior. Remember this phrase to help you:What you pet is what you get!So be mindful to use your interactions to cultivate positive mental states rather than negative.Instead of coddling and soothing your dog at the first sign of distress, let's learn to ignore minor stress and moments of uncertainty. Trust that your dog is a creature designed to overcome challenges, and that she is much more resilient than you give her credit for. Like kids, your dog will take cues from your level of reaction as a guide for how strongly they should feel and be concerned about situations.For more serious behavior issues, embark on a balanced obedience/training program which will instill confidence and growth. With the right training approach, even serious issues can be successfully tackled. Check out my basic free how-to videos HERE or my Foundation DVD HERE.So think of it this way: if there's a behavior that you would like your dog to do less of, don't do something that will increase the frequency of the behavior (petting, soothing, etc), and instead do something that will reduce its frequency (ignoring, correcting, or training).2) Thou shall keep your on-leash dog safe by not allowing interactions with unknown dogs, who are also on-leash. We learned in the previous post that dogs meeting on-leash tend to be in a compromised state, either due to stress from excitement and frustration of anticipating a meeting; or stress from nervousness and insecurity from trying to avoid a meeting (and, of course, some dogs are conflicted and vacillate between both). Either way we know that even really social dogs may end up in a negative interaction when on-leash due to these factors.So what's the right approach to dogs meeting on-leash?Well, in my opinion, you shouldn't let it happen. I just create a simple rule for my clients that they aren't to let their dogs interact on-leash with other dogs on the walk. The only exception to this is if the other dog is a well-known friend to your dog, you're certain they get on great and have no issues interacting - and your dog doesn't act like a knucklehead dragging you across the street to meet his buddy! For all other situations, I'd suggest simply deciding to avoid the possible drama and trauma of on-leash greetings, and use my favorite line to keep other owners and dogs at bay:"Sorry, my dog is in training." (It works every time!)Most of the motivation behind our desire to have on-leash meetings stem from our belief that our dogs need to meet every dog they see. That in order to be fulfilled and happy, they need to have interaction with all the neighborhood dogs. Believing this to be the case, and, of course, wanting our dogs to be happy (and not wanting to be a social outcast who says 'no' to other owners), we allow them to drag us over to random dogs at their discretion and peril. But the reality is that your dog needs structure and guidance from you on the walks much more than he needs to meet every dog in order to be happy and balanced - not to mention, safe.Remember that it's our job to advocate for our dogs and to keep them safe, sound and balanced when on-leash and off. Simply put, your dog needs you to make the smart decisions and understand what's best for him when it comes to safely navigating through our world.3) Thou shall ensure that your dog waits patiently at thresholds, heels politely, and obeys the rules of the structured walk. Previously we learned that allowing these behaviors oftentimes creates relationship issues, teaches your dog to ignore you, trains pushiness, and often creates stressed out little monsters. So let's not go there!Instead, focus on creating respectful, calm behavior at thresholds with your dog stopping and waiting for permission from you to move through. This simple exercise can dramatically change your dog's behavior on the walk and elsewhere. The trick is to not use a tense leash to hold your dog back from moving through the threshold, but, instead, use a quick pop on the leash if your dog should try to move past you. You can also ask your dog to sit first, but the way I do it, without a verbal command, actually challenges the dog more and encourages better focus and more respect.Check out my Threshold video below for step-by-step instructions on how to create better behavior and a better state of mind at thresholds:THRESHOLDS VIDEOSame goes for the walk itself. Many owners use constant pressure (holding the dog back with a tense leash) in an attempt to control the dog. This only makes for a tense, frustrated, struggle for both of you. What we're looking for is a short, but not tight, leash, that always has a little slack in it, except for the moments when you correct with an instantaneous leash pop and release. These leash pops are conversations to your dog that communicate where your dog should be position-wise.Check out my Walk video below for step-by-step instructions on how to create a calm, structured walk:WALK VIDEOAlso, see my post called Why Heel Matters.When done correctly, the structured walk (with relaxed leash and using leash pops to communicate) will keep your dog from pulling, keep him/her calm, and will prevent many of the outbursts and reactivity (barking and lunging). These outbursts typically come from dogs being overly-stressed due to straining, frustration, and feeling disconnected from you. As for the actual rules of the structured walk, don't allow your dog to pull, sniff, mark, or target other dogs. Your dog needs structure and rules from you in order to feel comfortable, respectful, and safe on the walk. You can allow your dog to have potty and sniff time on your release, not when your dog simply decides to pull you to something of interest.Owners often struggle with feeling bad about asking their dogs to walk in a more structured fashion. They feel they're denying their dogs the fun and joy of exploring and being dogs, but the reality is that your dog will actually enjoy the walk much more if he's calm, relaxed, and stress free.We recommend a 90/10 ratio of structure to freedom. Shoot for a 90% structured walk with your dog walking at your side with zero pulling and then 10% of freedom, potty time, and/or sniffing, spread out over the duration of the walk, as a reward for great behavior.If you will set the tone from the beginning of the walk at the thresholds, and then create a respectful, calm, structured walk, you will find your dog becoming a much more relaxed and comfortable dog, who looks to you for information and guidance, and is far better behaved in all other aspects of life, as well.4) Thou shall always supervise and direct the interactions of dogs who are new to each other. In the previous post, we learned that allowing dogs to work their relationships issues out on their own can be a recipe for disaster. Because there are so many variables and dynamics at play when dogs are being introduced to each other - territorial issues, excitement issues, competition issues, bad manners, trust issues, owner nervousness, etc - it's prime time for dogs to make bad choices and create bad blood right from the get-go.So, instead of leaving our dogs to sort things out when the deck is stacked against them, let's help set them up for success through some simple structure, rules, and guidance. If we will take the time to move slowly, be aware, and to create a calm and relaxed state where both dogs can comfortably get familiar with each other, and over the initial hump of newness, novelty, stress and pressure, we have a great chance to create a harmonious, safe, and happy relationship.Click HERE to read my post that gives step-by-step details of how to create this harmonious introduction.5) Thou shall utilize the dog park at your (and your dog's) own risk. We learned in the last post that while dog parks are a really cool idea in theory, unfortunately, the reality can be something very different. Many dogs develop trust issues with other dogs after having been bullied or attacked at the dog park, or off-leash, and this often spills over into creating dog reactivity and dog aggression issues down the line.Personally, I don't ever go into dog parks, and I recommend my clients avoid them as well. My suggestion is to find safe, balanced dogs that your dog can play with - create play dates with friends or neighbors who have good dogs, or take hikes or other excursions off-leash in a safe environment. Treadmills can be a great addition for helping higher energy dogs to expend some of that energy. Bike rides or jogging with your dogs are also awesome activities.If, for some reason, you're unable to utilize these other options and feel the dog park is a necessity for you and your dog, then here are a few tips to think about:

When you arrive, check out the vibe: Is it chaotic, are there too many dogs in a frenzied state? Are there any dogs who are engaging in bullying behavior or anything else that makes you nervous? If so, honor that feeling and skip the park or wait until later.
Having a rock solid recall on your own dog gives you a big edge in being able to manage and mitigate trouble.
If your dog is being chased or bullied and appears nervous, insecure, or that the play doesn't appear reciprocal, calmly go and intercept and get him/her out of there. A Pet Convincer is an awesome tool for helping with situations that could be problematic at the dog park - like interrupting an escalation or breaking up a fight.
Monitor the situation as you would if kids we're playing or wrestling. Don't allow things to continuously escalate and intensify - these escalated intensity/adrenaline moments are the perfect opportunity for trouble to break out. Work to maintain a fun but in-control vibe.

Remember, it's your job to advocate and protect your dog. Many owners use the dog park as a place for their ill-behaved dogs to run wild, and many other owners are totally unaware of what their dog is capable of and may not even be aware that their dog is dangerous. Once again, I don't recommend the dog park, but if you going to use it, be sure to be as safe, aware, and prepared as possible.6) Thou shall use a calm and relaxed tone and energy when interacting with and correcting your dog. In the previous post, I talked about the fallout that can occur when we use raised voices, anger, or emotional intensity in our interactions with our dogs, and how it's the natural by-product of the frustration that occurs when we don't use proper tools and strategy that let us communicate effectively.As a trainer, I see this all the time: Good, smart, emotionally-balanced people losing their cool and falling apart because they feel that they have no other way to effectively communicate and control their dog. I also remember how I would lose MY cool back in the days before I had any understanding of training or tools - it wasn't fun or pretty.The good news is that this is easily avoided and/or rectified by utilizing some simple training concepts and using tools that empower you. If you've been to my website or Facebook page, you know I'm a huge advocate of prong collars. I know many people have strong feelings about them, and that's okay, but as someone who's tried most of the methods and tools out there, and who's only goal is to help the average dog owner be successful, I've found few things that are able to turn an unhappy, frustrating, and dangerous dynamic around as quickly and effectively as a well-used prong collar. It's also extremely safe and very easy to use. So I almost always recommend owners who are struggling start here.Another part of the problem that leads to crazy owner syndrome is not using tools that help inside the house. As owners we instinctively understand that we need a leash and collar to safely control our dogs outside on walks, but for some reason (and trust me, I was included in this group some years ago!) we don't think to put a leash on in the house to help us direct, control, and train them. So our dogs run roughshod over us and everything else in the house. They bark, jump, mouth, destroy, and drive us nuts - and we, because we have no ability to control them without tools, lose our minds, yell, fuss, and fume.Most owners would be astounded by how much the "crazy" factor - for you and your dog! - is eliminated by simply leaving a leash and training collar on your dog in the house, and having the most rudimentary grasp of training skills on board. Suddenly you have the ability to give information, give direction, and also give corrections if needed, all without raising your voice or losing your cool. How cool is that? When we have tools that work and empower us, communication that is valuable, and dogs that actually listen and are safely controlled, we're able to stay calm, relaxed, and emotionally balanced.So have your dog wear a training collar and leash in the house, only when you are home supervising. Use this simple setup to empower you to calmly and confidently guide and train your dog in what you want as well as to correct the behavior you don't want - no yelling or frustration needed. :)7) Thou shall pick a dog who's physical energy and state of mind is compatible with your own. In the 10 "Don't"s, we learned about all of the possible fallout when humans and dogs start off with physical (energy) or mental (attitude/demeanor) incompatibility issues. When these divides are great, the outcomes are oftentimes frustrating, sad, and heartbreaking. The best way to avoid this unhappy situation is to become highly conscious of finding a dog that is a good match in both temperament and energy levels.If you're a highly active person (think hiking, running, adventuring etc), then a high energy dog can be a great fit. If you tend toward quiet, low-energy activities (think reading, web surfing, gardening, and relaxing walks), then a lower energy dog who will be comfortable in a lower gear would be a great fit. Imagine putting runner Usain Bolt in an office cubicle for eight hours a day and you can probably picture not only the frustration, but the lack of fulfillment and sadness that would occur. Athletic dogs need an athletic lifestyle - to choose one and not provide that lifestyle is dooming your dog and yourself to a very unhappy existence. This existence usually looks like barking, destruction, escaping, obsessive behavior etc.The other factor to consider, and one that can be harder to gauge, is mental disposition. Dogs, like people, come with all different types of attitudes and dispositions. You can have assertive golden retrievers and sweet, soft German Shepherds. Of course there are breed tendencies, but what I'm suggesting is that you focus less on breed and more on individual attitude/demeanor of the dog in front of you. A soft owner, a laid-back owner, an emotionally-fragile owner, or a sweet and overly-loving owner can all get themselves into serious trouble if they're attempting to cohabitate with an assertive, confident, bratty, or otherwise strong-minded dog. When dogs feel a serious assertiveness/strength/leadership discrepancy between themselves and the human that thinks they're in charge of setting rules and limits for them, you can see major friction arise. Some of the behaviors that can manifest from this friction are: resource guarding, bullying, territorial/protective issues, dog aggression, limits/rules being set on humans, and of course biting, if the human makes the mistake of breaking these rules or pushing these limits.Knowing all this, be sure to carefully observe the dog you're thinking about adding to your life. Watch for the attitude behind the cute exterior. Does the dog "feel" assertive, bratty, pushy, or stubborn? If so, honor that. We're able to easily sense these traits in people, but we often let the cuteness and love of dogs obscure our animal ability to objectively assess dog-attitude. Instead, check in with your inner human animal and let it tell you how the dog's attitude and demeanor "feels" to you.At the end if the day, it's all about compatibility. If you're a softie, try to find a softer dog; if you're confident and assertive, you have more leeway to work with firmer dogs. If you're a couch potato, try to find a low-key, chilled out dog; and if you're a high energy, action person, go find yourself a suitable partner in crime.Remember, to think that dogs are a one-size-fits-all is a recipe for struggle and heartache.8) Thou shall always have control of your off-leash dog and prevent him from harassing other dogs and owners. Okay, so in our original post we learned that even though we may have a super awesome dog that is friendly to all - or at least we think we do - our dog running up to another owner with a dog on-leash is highly unfair and highly selfish. This simple act can create serious dog reactivity issues for that dog, can undo hours and hours of progress and trust building for dog and owner, and can easily end in a serious dog fight (and maybe even a human to human fight!). So here are some suggestions:

Train your dog! Work on creating a bombproof recall at the very least. You can train this with a long line and training collar, with treats and toys if your dog is super mild and motivated, or the best and most dependable suggestion - E-collar recall. E-collar or remote-collar trained recall is the closest thing to 100% recall there is.

If training isn't your bag, then invest in a simple long line. You can get them from Amazon or Petco for a few bucks, and you can get 15, 25, or 50 feet lengths. This way you have freedom for you and your dog, but still some control. This doesn't guarantee your dog will come when called, but it offers a much higher level of control and safety.

Most importantly, I want you to simply be aware that even if you have a friendly, easy-going dog, many other owners aren't lucky enough to be in the same position. Ignoring this reality, and allowing your dog to pressure and stress out other dogs and owners is highly disrespectful and irresponsible. Your fellow dog owners and their dog's comfort, security, and enjoyment is just as important as yours. So get that dog trained, get him under control, or get him on a leash or long line.9) Thou shall honor your dog at the highest level and keep him balanced and healthy by treating him like a dog and not a human. In the previous post we talked about how indulging ourselves - sharing too much unearned affection, humanizing and babying our dogs, and not sharing the necessary structure, rules, and guidance - while feeling awesome for us, is almost always the greatest contributing factor to bad behavior and uncomfortable and unhappy dogs. As a professional trainer, I see this one almost constantly - and attempting to repair the behavioral fallout that occurs from it is a daily focus.When we baby, spoil and humanize, we not only create bratty and entitled dogs, but we also create stressed, anxious, and overwhelmed dogs. When dogs feel like they're without a strong, guiding presence in their world to lean and depend on, they begin to take on more responsibility and stress, and serious behavioral issues are often the result. So what's a conscientious dog owner to do?First, just becoming aware of the reality of this dynamic and the power of our affection and interactions is a good start. Understanding that our affection can be used to both help or harm, and then being mindful of wielding that power wisely is where we need to go. And it's not about one or the other - affection or discipline, all or nothing - no, it's all about balance.It's about being as believable in your discipline as you are in your affection.It's about being able to gift your dog with guidance that is as fluid as the real world is. We need to be able move between both worlds of lover and leader effortlessly and intelligently, being mindful to correct negative, unwanted behavior effectively and convincingly, and reward positive, healthy behavior. This doesn't mean reward for every simple action your dog makes that isn't negative!! Like anything else, that which is too easily obtained is not valued or appreciated. And if you reward constantly, and for everything, your dog will see you as needy, soft, and not to be followed - and he will likely become spoiled and entitled - expecting the world to revolve around him.A great approach to keep things between you and your dog on the harmonious path is to use obedience commands to have your dog work for your attention, for food, and for other valued interactions. This is a simple and effective strategy to help keep your relationship in balance and ensure your dog is in a heathy frame of mind, seeing resources comes from you at your discretion, and patterning a healthy habit of respectful, obedient behavior.A quick reminder! Be sure that you are the one who sets up these interactions, not your dog. In other words, you decide when to give affection, not your dog. You decide when feeding/treat time is, not your dog.Remember, what your dog needs and wants most is a balanced world where you fulfills all his needs - his need for structure, leadership, rules, discipline, guidance, play, adventure, exercise, and love. When you truly care and are truly aware, you doesn't just share the stuff that is fun, fulfilling, and pleasurable for yourself - you also share the stuff that is sometimes hard, sometimes not easy, and sometimes not fun. That's the true responsibility of raising dogs. That to me is real love.10) Thou shall appreciate and cultivate your dog's ability to be quiet, still, and relaxed. Okay, so in the last post, we talked about how many people mistake excited behavior for happiness and calm behavior for sadness. We also talked about how dogs that live in a perpetual state of excitement and adrenaline tend to be stressed and anxious and almost always have behavioral issues as a result. These issues can run the gamut, from mildly annoying, to the very serious and dangerous. So if we understand that excitement, adrenaline, stress, and anxiety are actually where problem behaviors come from, and that calm, relaxed, stress-free dogs tend to make great choices on their own, we can hopefully see the value in perceiving these states for what they truly are rather than what human emotions we project onto them.Of course, I'm not suggesting that every dog who is excited is stressed, or that every dog should be constantly calm and chilled out - absolutely not - but dogs who live in constant motion and who are unable to access calm and stillness when requested, are often dogs in trouble.So the only action step needed for this commandment is a perspective and awareness shift. Once you understand that many of the behaviors we associate with happiness are actually stress and anxiety, and many of the behaviors we associate with sadness are actually calm, relaxation, we can start to feel differently about what we're seeing from our dogs. With this understanding, we can also start to prioritize some activities and exercises that actually condition our dogs to comfortably access both the active world and the still world, and in doing so, cultivate better mental health and stability.Read about this simple but incredibly powerful exercise that will teach your dog how to be calm, relaxed, and comfortable in a chaotic world HERE.

thegooddoglifeblogAugust 25, 2016

The 10/10 Principle

By Sean O'SheaWhat's the number one question we get from owners? When can we pet him? When can we love on him? When can he be on the couch? When can he have total freedom? Okay, that's several questions, but you get the idea, right? ;)When people get dogs they don't get them thinking they'll have to temper their affection. They don't think couch privilege might not be on the menu. They don't think they'll have to restrict their dog's ability to roam the house. But, if things have gone sideways with their dog's behavior and their relationship with their dog, changing or adjusting these things might just be what's needed to help sort that behavior and relationship stuff out.What many owners don't understand is that these seemingly benign privileges and interactions can create strong feelings and perceptions in our dogs - feelings and perceptions about us, their owners. Feelings of permissiveness, softness, neediness - feeling like we might just be ripe for the taking advantage of. With certain dogs, these interactions and privileges we share can unintentionally convey that listening, respecting, and prioritizing us, isn't something they need to worry about. And this can cause lots of problems.You may see horrible behavior on walks, territorial stuff around the house or yard, possessiveness, guarding, neurotic barking, fighting amongst household dogs, fear and nervousness, or even human aggression.But here's the thing, these privileges and interactions, on their own, aren't the sole cause of the problems - actually, they can be almost totally benign. So then what's the problem? The problems arise when these privileges and interactions occur IN THE ABSENCE of their counterbalance - the training, leadership, rules, authority, and accountability. It's when the conversation is completely lopsided that things get funky. Owners don't realize they're having a one-sided, dysfunctional conversation with their dogs that is leading things astray. They don't realize they're giving all the privileges and freedom and love, without asking for anything in return. And when things are given excessively, freely, with no boundaries, and no demands for corresponding good behavior, things can get ugly, fast. Respect goes out the window, and dogs get stressed, anxious, nervous, opportunistic, and freaked out!So trainers, looking to shore things up, even things out, and re-balance the human-to-dog conversation, ask owners to remove or reduce certain privileges and interactions. The goal is to shift the way your dog feels about you and your household back to a more healthy space, and thus, get your dog himself to shift back to a more healthy space. And usually, when things are just beginning, when you're just starting to work on resetting your dog and your relationship, we want to create as much leverage as possible; to create the strongest perceptions we can. So we go hard on the changes. Perhaps zero affection. Perhaps zero roaming. Perhaps zero furniture access. But that's only half of the equation. It's not just about what we remove - it's also about what we add (that leadership, rules, accountability stuff!) that really makes things click. It's striking that balance between asking and giving that creates the magic.But what about those inevitable questions at the top of this post? When can owners loosen up? When can the affection creep back in? When can the dog have more freedom and access? How do owners know how much is too much? Honesty, it depends on the dog, and it depends on you. It depends on how bad things have been, how out of balance you both are, and perhaps most importantly, what you're capable of sharing in regards to the other side of the conversation. The leadership conversation. And this is where our 10/10 Principle comes in. :)Here's what we share with our owners to help them wrap their heads around the formula for keeping their dogs and relationship in balance, especially as they're working through problem behaviors, training and relationship transitioning. We use a number system to make it easy and clear. On our scale, if you're a 2 in the leadership/rules department, you better be a 2 in affection/freedom department. If you're a 6 in the leadership/rules department, then you can be a 6 in the affection/freedom department. See how it works? It's just about balancing the conversation so your dog stays...balanced. Your job is to make sure your numbers line up as best you can. If you're an 8 in affection and freedom, and a 2 in discipline, you're gonna have issues!The truth is, most owners struggle with the discipline side of things. They struggle with the rules, the enforcement, and structure, so keeping an eye on the corresponding freedoms is essential. If you use this scale - honestly! - it can help you better navigate all those tough questions above. It can also help you tweak what's out of whack and allow for an easy check-in with what's really going on relationship-wise.So the answer to all those tough questions is on you. What are you able to change within yourself? What space of leadership are you able to step into? How believable can you be as an authority figure? What leadership, rules, and accountability level can you honestly embody? (And this number can always change and improve if you're working on it!) It's a great formula to help owners see super clearly what their responsibility is, and the hard work they have to do in order to have the fun stuff they desire with their dog.Remember, the numbers don't lie. Ask yourself seriously what level of discipline, rules, structure, and leadership you're able to embody, and then adjust you and your dog's lifestyle accordingly. The more leadership you can embody, the more latitude you get. The less leadership on tap, the less latitude you get. If you're honest with yourself, you can create a lifestyle that works and keeps everyone happy and balanced.P.S. My personal dogs are allowed on the bed, on the couch, get loads of freedom, and plenty of affection. I'd say they're just about in the 9-10 range. But at the same time, if something silly goes down, if there's a serious transgression or mistake, you better believe that they know that the ole number 10 of discipline isn't far behind. And it's that willingness to be the authority figure, to share with my dogs what I know they need from me - to do the hard stuff rather than just the easy stuff - that allows us to maintain a happy, respectful, and fun-filled life together. You know, all that stuff that owners want. :)

thegooddoglifeblogJuly 14, 2016

Show Me Don't Tell Me

By Sean O'SheaFew industries have as much contentious, friction-filled, vitriolic, opinionated, near-religious beliefs being flung around as does the dog training world.Opinionated owners and trainers will noisily (and nastily) condemn the tools, training methods, and approaches being used by others. It might be pure positive trainers (or believers) cursing prong collars, e-collars, and/or any form of correction - or even saying "no" to your dog - or perhaps it's "balanced" trainers slinging mud at each other for perceived poor training, or training that doesn't mesh with their beliefs.Regardless of what camp you belong to, what tools you do or don't endorse, and what philosophy you subscribe to, it's all talk until you show your work. Until you show proof of what you speak.And in this day and age that should be easy enough, right? Everyone has a video recorder in their pocket today. So if anyone has some super strong beliefs, concepts, techniques, alternatives, man, I'm all ears. But first, I'm all eyes. First, show me. Don't tell me. If your approach gets great results, show me. If you're tools get great results, show me. If your revolutionary process creates revolutionary results, show me. It's easy enough.Don't show me scientific studies, or site science-y sounding rhetoric. Don't talk to me about the how's and why's and benefits of a certain method. Don't offer strongly felt opinions. Instead, show me. Show me truly troubled dogs, before training, and show me these same troubled dogs transformed, or at least tremendously improved, after training. And show me a lot of them. Don't show me your dog, or one dog, or even three or four dogs, show me over and over your approach creating great results - and the owners getting the same results.If you're getting great results, this should be easy enough to do. I know it's work to capture before footage and after footage, and to edit it and all. I get it. But if you want your opinion to have any legs, and any chance of being entertained, that's the price of admission today. If you want anyone to listen, to care, to change, to adopt something, simply show us its value. Easy peasy.And just to be clear, I'm not being a chest-beater, and declaring everyone needs to show their results (even though that sure would be nice for consumers!), it's only for those who shout, scream, bully, belittle, or not-so-cleverly undermine others. Those who shout about alternatives - alternative tools, methods, approaches. If you're shouting, you should be ready to share your results, your proof. And lots of it.Because here's the thing, talk is cheap. Everyone can talk a big game. We all can declare certain tools or approaches to be the worst, or the best, but only results matter. Only results are real. Only results walk the talk. Everything else is just the easy part...talk and opinion.Show me.P.S. If you're an owner trying to make sense of all this stuff, my suggestion is to follow the results. But be a conscientious consumer, and be aware that video (especially those using the trainer's own dogs) can be made to look awfully good! Many dogs shown in the positive only camp are very specific dogs (Border Collies, Aussies etc.). Dogs who enjoy chasing a ball or frisbee or a treat more than they do chasing, attacking, or freaking out on another dog, or person. And in the balanced camp, watch for high-drive working dogs (Malinois and GSD's) who were bred to work and do amazing stuff. In both of these camps these special dogs get used for showy videos and demos, but are not showing reality - they're showing "ringers". Not that these breeds can't be a mess as well, but dog trainer dogs are usually picked for their exceptional temperament and good behavior, so it's not a good reflection of the reality of what your dog's behavior will look like. Make sure you see actual client dogs making progress. And make sure you see the actual clients duplicating that process.

thegooddoglifeblogJuly 6, 2016

Blurred Lines

By Sean O'SheaSo how come things have gotten so much more dicey with our dogs? How come there seems to be far more ill-behaved dogs than the "good old days"? How come there's so much aggression, resource guarding, possessiveness, separation anxiety, reactivity, and so on?Am I just out of touch and remembering romantically those past days when dogs seemed to be dogs and humans seemed to be humans - and both seemed to be the better for it?I'm not so sure. I'm 48. I was born in the late 60's. I remember very clearly the way our dogs lived with us (and the way most of my friend's dogs did as well). Our dogs were far from perfect, but I don't remember hearing much about many of the above issues. There was "dog world" and "human world". Dogs were mostly outside, had special privilege days or hours when they got to come inside. They were companions we enjoyed during outdoor adventures or ball throwing and family time in the yard. We saw them as dogs, and for the most part, lived with them emotionally and physically like dogs. And that separation seemed to create some very clear boundaries between the two species. There was clarity.But boy how things have changed. :)These days, most dogs live inside. They share our personal and intimate space freely. But that's not all that's changed. Along with the physical access, they've also moved inside our hearts and minds in a way that never existed previously. Not that previous generations didn't love their dogs, I'm sure they did, but the role our dogs play in our emotional lives today seems much different than that of the past. Today's dogs have access physically and emotionally to places that weren't typically up for grabs prior. And because of this new dynamic - this dynamic of compete sharing, complete access, and complete emotional integration - we've blurred lines. We've created a lot of confusion and mixed messages, and we've set our dogs up to make natural assumptions and decisions based on those messages. Those assumptions and decisions have created a lot of negative fallout for our dogs, and for us who share our lives with them.Now let me be clear about a few things. I love having my dogs inside. I'd hate to live with my crew outside. My guys are allowed on furniture, sleep on my bed, and roam the house pretty much as they please. We share the space. My guys are also very important to me emotionally. They're still dogs, but they hold a special place in my heart, and I think that's pretty clear to them.So this begs the question: with this new dynamic of near total integration and sharing, how the heck do you keep your dogs balanced, respectful, polite, and well-behaved in the face of all these mixed messages? My feeling is this. Once we took our dogs inside, once we made them our daily physical and emotional companions, it changed what was required of us. Our parents (or maybe you if you're of that older generation) could probably get away with not doing as much training. They likely didn't need to create a ton of structure, be uber-pack leaders, or use the same tools and strategies to keep their dogs balanced. Their dogs were dogs. But for us, the ones blurring the lines, we've got a different reality.Because we've shifted our dog's perceptions of us, because we've integrated them so deeply into our lives, because we've leaned so hard on them emotionally - many becoming surrogate children, spouses, or friends - we've got a whole different reality. A reality where we have to work a heck of a lot harder to keep them balanced.Once we brought them into our world in this more intimate fashion, it all changed. Our jobs as dog owners got harder, more complex. Our responsibilities, if we're to have healthy, balanced dogs, got heavier, and more challenging.The upshot is this, we've fundamentally changed how we live and interact with our dogs, there's no getting around it, and I don't think it's changing any time soon. Our dogs have become central players in our lives; family members we cherish and adore. And that's not necessarily a bad thing...IF we're prepared to do the hard work that come with that. With this new way of living comes greater challenges; the possibility of neurotic behavior, feelings of entitlement, boundary pushing, disrespect and lots more. For me, the answer was to make sure that as deep as I loved, and as much freedom I granted, that I shared equally firm, unquestionable discipline. While my guys know I love them deeply, they also know that any monkey business is met with firm, immediate, and valuable consequences. That balance of love and leadership is what allows me to have the best of both worlds.It's work my folks and their friends likely never had to do, at least not at this level. For the most part, they chose to have their dogs be dogs, and that meant an easier human/dog lifestyle path in many ways. But that might also have meant the absence of intimate dog companionship, and perhaps lonely outdoor lives for many dogs. So there's trade offs in both. But for those of us choosing to live in the more integrated fashion, remember that that freedom, connection and enjoyment comes at a cost - if we want to have happy, healthy dogs we can enjoy. And that cost is more awareness, more responsibility, more effort, and the willingness to share as much discipline as we share love.With every gift comes an equal responsibility.

CONNECT WITH US ON

, and

for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!

Our groundbreaking, game-changing dog training book

The Good Dog Way: Love Them By Leading Them

is now available for order! Click

HERE

to order your copy!

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE BOOK TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogJune 28, 2016

Healing Mental And Physical Illness Through Training??

By Sean O'SheaSomething that I think is hard for a lot of folks to wrap their heads around is that many of the issues their dogs have (both physiologically and psychologically) are simply the symptoms of being stressed and anxious. Dogs who are constantly on edge, worried, reactive, stressed and anxious have nervous and immune systems that take a beating. And when these systems take a beating, there's going to be fallout. You're body and mind are going to take a hit.On a regular basis, we see dogs that come in that spin, that self-mutilate, that fixate on shadows or light, that have bowel issues, allergies, skin issues, car sickness, and on and on. What's fascinating is to watch how many of these dogs - without any medication or diet changes - manage to heal themselves mentally and/or physically once having gone through our training program.We've seen it over and over. An owner has been through all kinds of testing, meds, diet changes etc., and their dogs have remained stuck with whatever issues they've been struggling with. Then, after a two or three-week board and train, voila, the issue has magically disappeared or dissipated tremendously. Of course, this isn't the case for every dog, but the numbers of afflicted dogs who have moved through long-standing issues would amaze (and delight!) you.We've seen dogs that tail chew to the point of actually losing a portion of the tail, stop chewing. We've seen spinners stop spinning. We've seen light chasers stop chasing. We've seen chronic loose stools firm up nicely. We've seen skin issues clear up beautifully. And we've seen car sickness just up and disappear. (Emma, who just went home from a three-week program had her first ride without throwing up just the other day!)One client recently asked me how come vets don't know or understand or recommend training for these issues. While I'm sure some vets do (bravo!), the vast majority either aren't aware of it or aren't down with it. It's a shame, but hopefully, posts like this can help inform owners about possible options.In reality, it's all kind of simple. If it was you instead of your dog, if it was you that were dealing with high levels of stress and anxiety chronically, your nervous system and immune system would take a beating too. You too would likely develop outlets for all that toxicity and see physical issues arise. Physiological and psychological problems are a commonly accepted result of chronic stress and anxiety in humans. Why would it be any different for our dogs?But here's the rub. We're much better at recognizing (and understanding) stress and anxiety in humans than we are in our dogs. We know that stress and anxiety show up in our world by way of financial issues, work issues, relationship issues etc. Our dog's stress and anxiety are created and expressed differently. We see chronic reactivity (in the house and outside), neurotic barking, hyper-territorial behavior, bullying/being bullied, overly protective/possessiveness, assessing/worrying about strangers and guests, constant boundary pushing, and often just being hyped-up and on-edge the majority of the time, never knowing how to unplug and relax.If we could learn to see all these behaviors as massive stress and anxiety producers, and understand that they create much of the seemingly unconnected negative physical and psychological symptoms, we might look at these behaviors as being less annoying "dog stuff" and more problematic in the real sense.And how do we get there? In many ways it's simple stuff. When we take those negative options away, when we block unwanted behavior, when we provide structure, rules, leadership, and accountability, we remove many of the stress/anxiety creating options/reactions that actually give life to the above listed symptoms. When we break old negative habits and patterns of coping, and provide new and healthier replacements, we end up with a nervous system and immune system that is solid and firing on all cylinders. And when we manage to do that successfully we end up with much healthier dogs.Of course training can fix many annoying behavior issues and create a better relationship and clear communication. We can get dogs to come when we call, stay in place instead of roaming, stand instead of jump, walk nicely on-leash, and live peacefully with us instead of making us crazy. But training can also help many issues that have long been allocated to veterinarians, medication, and management only. Good training can actually heal the mind and body.

CONNECT WITH US ON Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!Our groundbreaking do-it-yourself E-Collar training video/PDF training guide Learn to Train The Good Dog Way: E-Collar Training is now available for order! Click HERE to order your copy!

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogJune 21, 2016

You, Your Dog, And Consequences

By Sean O'SheaWhat happens after you get a speeding ticket? What happens after your doctor tell you your cholesterol is dangerously high? What happens when your spouse threatens to leave because of your behavior? What happens when your accountant tells you you've spent far more than you earned?Well, if any of the above matter to you, a couple things will happen. One, it'll create some fear (what might happen if I don't change this or it happens again?). Two, it should create some serious contemplation (Perhaps this choice/action, even if I've enjoyed it in the short term, doesn't serve me in the long run). Three, it should create some future better choices (if the consequence matters, it should cause you to choose a better, more healthy choice next time).All of the above are communications about behavior, and their possible consequences. Consequences that are the result of our choices and actions. And they serve a purpose. Their purpose is to remind you that something you're doing is putting you or your quality of life in danger. And if you look at consequences that way you can view them as gifts - gifts that enable you to reorder, course correct, change behavior that is putting you in harm's way.Consequences for your dog should create the same results. Of course the context will be different. They won't be overspending, eating too many hot fudge sundaes, or racing down the freeway. But they might be bolting out the front door, jumping on people, attacking another dog in the house, barking excessively, counter surfing, guarding their food, pulling like crazy on the walk, or destroying stuff in the house. And all these behaviors impact your dog's overall quality of life as well as yours.Dogs get hit by cars every day for bolting, and dogs are returned to shelters every day for jumping, barking, guarding, destruction etc. Dogs also die every day from obstructions from eating things they shouldn't. This is real stuff.But in our current dog owning culture, consequences are things that are deeply frowned upon. They're things that many purport to be dangerous to your dog's mental and emotional well being, as well as detrimental to your relationship. Best to ignore the bad and reinforce the good, right? But what if life treated us the same way? What if the policeman ignored your speeding but offered you a "Nice job!" when he saw you driving appropriately? What if your doctor ignored your cholesterol count but said "Good work, you lost two pounds."? What if your spouse ignored your inability to manage your anger and stress, but said "You were lovely tonight" when you didn't explode for a change? What if your accountant ignored your spending issues but said "Nice work on only spending 5k over your budget rather than the usual 10k"?What would happen is that, instead of receiving the gravity of the communication of what your actions are creating (and the danger they're putting you in), you'd be allowed to believe things aren't as dire or serious as they actually are. And that absence of clearly conveyed consequence for unhealthy behavior would put you directly in harm's way. By not being direct about what is okay and what isn't. By ignoring the truth of our actions. By prioritizing things feeling "good" rather than true, we'd be setup for impending disaster.And so it is with our dogs. We don't clearly let them know what is isn't okay. We ignore the bad and reward the good. We give our dogs a partial view of the reality, and then they pay the price for that lack of clarity and truth. People recommending you ignore the bad and reward the good are people who aren't connecting reality - universal reality. The reality of the beauty of consequences. The beauty of knowing clearly what is acceptable, heathy, wanted, and what is not allowed, dangerous, and totally unacceptable.

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogJune 17, 2016

What Didn't Happen To Your Dog

By Sean O'SheaSo many dog with issues tend to automatically get labeled as abused. Their owners or caretakers often create elaborate stories and possible causes for their fear, insecurity, reluctance, panic, and unique emotional triggering around specific people or things.And of course there are abused dogs out there. Of course there are dogs who have seen some really unfortunate stuff, and their behavior might be directly connected to that abuse. But in my experience as a trainer, I see very few true abuse cases, and far less abuse as the root cause of most behavior issues - including fear.What do I see more often as the actual root cause of so many behavior issues? Usually what I see isn't some horrible event or trauma that occurred. Usually what I see is either a lack of exposure, a lack of leadership and guidance, a lack of solid genetics - or a combination of all three.The lack of exposure - which is more often referred to as socialization - is all about dogs being exposed to all kinds of novel stimuli at crucial points of the dog's development. Without this exposure, many things that a well-socialized dog would be solid and easy with are instead huge stress and fear triggers. Almost like us seeing space creatures or a ufo. If you've never seen something before, there's a good chance it'll freak you out. And if your dog hasn't seen a lot of stuff, and built a comprehensive stress tolerance and overall generalizing confidence that comes from that early exposure, he's likely to be afraid, skittish, worried, maybe even downright neurotic about stuff.The lack of leadership and guidance can exacerbate the gaps listed above, or create large issues out of small ones. Here's how this looks. A dog with some level of concern/worry/stress/fear experiences something troubling, and instead of being given information about how to better handle the stressor/trigger, the dog is allowed to experience it sans help or guidance. This means your dog experiences something troublesome, worrisome, fear-inducing, and instead of you working him through it, your dog feels the stressor and is left worried. Even well-intentioned owners often miss or allow small moments of insecurity, or are unsure how to address the issue properly. Typically this means your dog will become more and more stressed, more and more worried, and more and more fearful. This might look like out and out fear, nervous barking/growling, or even aggression towards dogs or people.One last piece of this puzzle is genetics. Genetics plays a huge role in how dogs adapt to their world and how resilient they are. Many dogs who have genetics that aren't robust and confident will behave in very skittish and fearful ways. This behavior often gets labeled as abuse based as well - these dogs will cower, shake and have extremely poor body language. And while it might look bad, it's simply the stuff the dog came with. No abuse, no neglect. Genetic-based insecurity and fear often looks the worst, and can be some of the toughest stuff to overcome.Once again, there are abused dogs. I've seen them. But the reality is, the vast majority of problem behaviors, fear issues, and other stuff that gets labeled as having an origin in abuse isn't abuse at all. It's far more often about what didn't happen to the dog, rather than what did. Exposure that didn't happen. Leadership that didn't happen, and even genetics that didn't happen.It's a great reality check, to remind people that while abuse does exist, it's far less prevalent than presented, and far less of a cause of behavior issues then most think. And understanding this is crucial to helping owners move from a place of feeling sorry for, or making excuses for their dogs, to instead training, leading, and guiding them with strength and resolve.And that's the only way to truly help your dog move forward, regardless of the cause.

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogJune 9, 2016

Permission-Based Training: How And Why It Works

By Sean O'SheaOne of our primary goals when training and rehabbing dogs is to shift them out of auto-pilot, reactionary, impulsive mode, and get them into a listening, processing, thinking mode. What does this auto-pilot/reactionary/impulsive behavior mode look like? It's the mode where the dog sees, hears, smells something and instantly reacts to it. No evaluating involved. It's where the dog wants to do something, or to access something, and simply does it, with zero concern for the outcome.It's an impulse control issue. Feel = do! No thinking, no evaluating, no value given to the choice, just an instant desire and an instant response. And it's here that so many dogs get into trouble. Allowed to practice this "auto-pilot" way of life, it becomes their default. I want something I take it. I dislike something I growl. I want to run somewhere, I go. I see a dog on the walk I go bananas. I'm afraid of something I hide. And on and on.This is where permission based training comes in to save the day. Permission based training isn't anything fancy, but it is highly effective. Basically, we start teaching the dog that he needs to look to us before making decisions - not every decision mind you, just the ones that matter. The important decisions. The decisions that have serious ramifications, serious gusto behind them, or are reinforcing patterns of impulsive behavior.This new way of living/behaving creates many positive changes. First and foremost, it calms the dog down. Dogs living on the edge of constant action or reaction (think of a runner at the starting line - always ready to explode) are typically super tightly wound, nervous, and edgy. Along with the calmness, it also creates handler respect, which is paramount to a healthy relationship. (A dog who looks to his owner for permission is usually a dog in a good headspace.) And of course, it teaches tons of impulse control, and gets the dog to think before acting - creating a safer, more conscious dog. All major pieces of the training/rehab/healthy dog puzzle.Once a dog begins to look to you for permission, rather than just reacting to impulse, you'll see much of the manic, hyped-up, tuned-out, crazy, disrespectful, and disobedient behavior disappear.Here's a few examples of where we work on this and where permission is needed:-Crate (going in or out)-Thresholds (going in or out)-Place command (not leaving unless given permission)-Eating (waiting for release)-Peeing/sniffing on walks (waiting for release)-Walking in a structured "heel" fashion (unless released)-Any command that the dog has been asked to be in (must wait for release)-Furniture (wait for permission)-Personal space (must wait for permission to access)-Getting in our out of the car (wait for permission)-A bomb-proof recall (must always come back on command, wait for permission to roam - or not, perhaps the greatest impulse control/relationship builder)-And any other contexts where you see a lot of excitement/pushiness/determination etc.Teaching your dog to look to you, to ask you for permission before simply reacting is the true secret sauce to transforming both behavior and attitude. It creates a more relaxed, respectful, thinking dog. And who doesn't want that?

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogMay 26, 2016

Building An Athlete

By Sean O'SheaOne of the biggest messages out there in dog training is the one about a tired dog being a good dog. The premise is, that if you'll just find a way to tucker your dog out consistently, he'll be happy, well-behaved, and chill. Your job is to find out how to exercise him or her enough to create this magic.But here's the rub. How would you, the human, go about becoming more athletic, having more stamina, more go-go juice, more endurance? You know the answer. It's an easy one. You'd workout. Consistently. Every day you'd push yourself, and every day you'd either maintain or increase your athletic abilities. Would you be tired post-workout? Sure. Of course. But after a little rest you'd be stronger, faster, and more resilient. And because exercise is addicting, because it releases so many pleasurable hormones, you'd be dying to go tomorrow!!It's the same for our dogs. We exercise them like crazy, teach them to just go, go, go, and then we wonder why they're movement/action/adrenaline junkies. We turn them into super athletes who NEED the fix daily. But even with the fix, they're still crazy and ill-behaved - just not for the hour post-action.Of course we, and our dogs need exercise, release, fun, activity etc., and we should all make sure to provide that for ourselves and our dogs. It's a big part of being healthy. But it's not the only part! Just like we need the other side of the coin -the calm, the focused, the relaxed - so do our dogs. Our dogs need a balance. They need the go and the slow. The on switch, and the off switch.And just like we can cultivate super athlete dogs, we can also cultivate relaxed dogs. We can cultivate and condition our dogs to be relaxed and calm through certain kinds of training and lifestyle. But most owners (and trainers) seem to forget this essential piece of the puzzle.If you were looking to learn how to slow your hyper-mind down, if you were looking to learn how to relax, if you were looking to learn how to be calm and chilled, you wouldn't expect exercise to be your only answer. No. You'd work on quiet activities - like reading, meditation, something creative, a quiet walk, downtime, rest. Of course this isn't a perfect parallel for our dogs; they can't do all the stuff we can, but they can do their own versions of it. And they can reap similar rewards.Some simple suggestions would be:-Slow your walk with your dog. (If it's a slow, structured heel it will work the brain far more than a speedy walk. Remember, slow is hard for dogs, fast is easy.)-Teach duration "place" or "down" commands. (Few things will transform your dog's behavior as dramatically as duration work. We call this doggie meditation for a reason. It slows the mind, and teaches dogs to learn to ignore the myriad stimuli that are going on all around them - and which they usually react to. This helps condition a calm, peaceful dog.)-Teach your dog to be able to manage its energy when playing. (Develop an "on/off" switch by utilizing action then dead-stop inaction. Play fetch or tug and after a few reps ask for a long down and walk away, move around, and then restart. This teaches your dog to learn to manage him or herself even when energy gets flowing - and that the play and action can stop at any moment.)-Only allow access to what your dog wants when calm behaviors are offered. (Crate rushing, threshold rushing, car door rushing, food rushing etc. All these are examples of opportunities to teach calm gets what you desire, thus conditioning more calm choices.)-Correct any unwanted, over the top behavior. (It's up to you to teach your dog what is and what isn't acceptable behavior. Stopping monkey business - think jumping on and off furniture, running around the house, jumping on people, barking at you or anything, mouthing etc - and overly aroused behavior will give your dog access to better choices.)-Slow yourself down! (Our dogs will definitely mirror us, and if we're constantly on-edge, agitated, moving fast, anxious, and stressed, we're far more likely to see similar stuff from them. If you'll provide a more calm, conscious, chilled out you, you'll have much better chance of getting more of this from your dog.)The main point here is that exercise alone won't give you the dog you want. It won't create a well-behaved, calm, respectful, relaxed dog. But the appropriate balance of exercise, structure, rules, and actually conditioning slower, calmer behavior will.

CONNECT WITH US ON Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!Our groundbreaking do-it-yourself E-Collar training video/PDF training guide Learn to Train The Good Dog Way: E-CollarTraining is now available for order! Click HERE to order your copy!

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogMay 17, 2016

The Hardest Thing

Photo Oct 30, 2 18 17 PM By Sean O'SheaWhat's the hardest thing for both owners and trainers? It's the power of association, emotional habits, perceptions, and feelings. All the stuff owners have accidentally or inadvertently created between their dogs, themselves, and their environments.Watching well-trained, calm, and obedient dogs literally become different animals - reactive, aggressive, crazed, freaked out, incapable of listening etc - right before your eyes as the owner enters the room, grabs the leash, or returns the dog home is something that never ceases to amaze and confound.It's the one thing we can't control. Even with owners doing their homework, having the tools and commands down pat, and showing up ready to change it all, it's still the wildcard in play. For many dogs it's a seamless transition - they jump right into the new game. For others, it's a totally different story. These dogs are so affected by the relationship/associations/feelings they have with their owners that their minds and nervous systems simply meltdown.They are so aroused, excited, overwhelmed, over-stimulated, and most of all, reconnected to their past feelings (dependency, guarding, fear, anxiety, excitement, possessiveness etc) that they're completely different dogs. They don't respond to commands. They don't care about the tools. They react when they didn't react. They explode when they previously didn't care. The just-minutes-ago calm, and well mannered dog, disappears in an instant! They actually engage in physical ticks and behaviors (rolling on the ground, scratching, licking, spinning, whining etc) to try to channel out some of this toxic remembrance and association.This is the power of relationship and association. Dogs not only get into behavioral patterns, they also get into emotional, and physiological (secretions of stress hormones) patterns. They actually feel emotionally different, and physically different around their owners and environments. To be successful with these guys, it's not just about training new behaviors and habits, no, we're talking about needing to actually reprogram the emotions and the body of these dogs.To be successful, these dogs need to actually FEEL different in their owner's presence and in their home environments. And this is the Mt Everest that these owners have to climb, if they want their dogs to be safe, polite, relaxed, and well-behaved. These owners have work ahead of them that many aren't going to be down for, simply because it's too hard, too exhausting, and takes too much perseverance. It's not your usual dog training hand over, it's something totally different. It's human and dog reboot time. World Series version.This was me with my two dogs, Oakley and Junior. It took me fighting and wanting it so bad, for over a year and a half to get them to finally reset. We had SO many negative, toxic associations and feelings, that the only fix was tons of time and tons of effort. Daily battle, of me wanting this and being unwilling to give it up unrealized. It was messy, and it was far from pretty, but we got there. Finally.For other owners who find themselves in this position, I can tell you that what you want is definitely possible, but I can also assure that it can be an incredibly hard, and long road. And only those who want it bad enough to go out day after day and earn back a new relationship, create new associations, and develop new feelings will get it. It will be hard, it will be uncomfortable, it will often feel hopeless, and it might even be embarrassing, but that's the required exchange if you find you and your dog in this predicament, and you want to find your way back out.P.S. Yes this is about training, tools, commands, rules, structure, and accountability, but even more so it's about the inner resolve to become the person you need to be daily, in every moment, to create these lasting changes in your dog's perception of you.

CONNECT WITH US ON Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!Our groundbreaking do-it-yourself E-Collar training video/PDF training guide Learn to Train The Good Dog Way: E-CollarTraining is now available for order! Click HERE to order your copy!

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogMarch 30, 2016

How To Mess Up A Dog!

By Sean O'SheaSo much of what we see with problem dogs and their behavior, is that people have unintentionally reinforced and encouraged the wrong stuff. And of course, none of us want to intentionally mess up our dogs (even though many of us - including your's truly have). So here's a little list of reminders that we'll call the "don't do", or "watch out for" list. Keeping these in mind, and doing your very best to avoid these common dog/owner traps will go a long way towards you having a great relationship, and enjoyable life with your dog.-Trying to love a badly behaved dog better. (Guaranteed to make a bad dog worse)-Coddling, nurturing, babying an insecure, nervous dog. (The very best way to deepen insecurity, and to ensure a neurotic mess of a dog)-Allowing a dog to have constant access to you and your personal space - following you everywhere, jumping in your lap uninvited, always needing to be near. (The perfect recipe for separation anxiety and possessiveness)-Constantly petting a dog. (The very best way to create a dependent, nervous, entitled, bratty, separation anxiety dog)-Ignoring bad behavior - jumping, whining, barking, fence fighting, growling etc. - in the hopes it will go away. (It never does, it only gets worse)-Using your dog to fill emotional gaps in your life. (The most common reason for neurotic, unstable dog behavior)-Not enforcing rules because they feel bad. (A selfish act that ensures your dog will not have access to the rules and leadership it needs to thrive and be balanced)-Letting dogs be “dogs” - thinking/rationalizing that growling, protective behavior, resource guarding, reactivity etc. is normal/acceptable. (This excuses unacceptable/unhealthy behavior by calling it “normal” and allows it to continue/increase)-Being inconsistent. (Teaches dogs rules and boundaries are always negotiable, and ensures they will be negotiated)-Accidentally rewarding whining/barking/growling by petting/talking to/letting in or out of a door/crate. (Teaches dogs that those behaviors get them what they want, and ensures you’ll see a whole lot more of them)-Spoiling/allowing bad behavior due to guilt. (Feeling guilty about working long hours/being away from home for long periods and trying to assuage that guilt by spoiling the dog/being permissive/allowing bad behavior to occur to make ourselves feel better. Unfortunately it only makes your dog feel/behave worse)-Letting stressed, pulling, anxious, worked up dogs meet on-leash. (This is a common scene that can create dog reactivity and even dog fights)-Letting dogs pull to trees or bushes on walks. (Teaches dogs that pushiness gets them what they want)-Touching, talking to, "enjoying" a dog who jumps on you. (Reinforces jumping and guarantees more jumping)-Letting dogs “work it out” on their own (Old school approach to “ ocializing" dogs that is a great way for creating dog fights and never ending tension/grudges between dogs that live together)-Giving treats or petting a growling/barking/anxious/stressed dog to calm and soothe them. (A very common mistake that does the exact opposite of making it better. It always makes the behavior worse, by reinforcing it)-Sharing only your soft, sweet, loving, affectionate side. (This is akin to only saying yes and cuddling your child, and never saying no or enforcing rules. It leaves dogs feeling alone and unsure about who’s in charge, nervous, anxious, stressed, and out of control - just like it would kids)-Using tools that allow dogs to ignore you and the tool. (The wrong tools - harnesses, flat collars, flex leases etc - can actually empower the dog to misbehave and disempower you from communicating with your dog)-Using tools that allow/encourage the dog to behave worse. (See above!)-Seeing freedom, love, and affection as more vital to your dog's well-being than structure, rules, guidance. (This is a common mistake, born out of either our desire to nurture, our desire to fulfill ourselves, or not understanding that dogs need guidance and leadership at least as much as they do “love”. It’s also the best way to truly mess up a dog)-Thinking exercise and activity create calm, relaxed dogs on their own. (This is a huge misconception. exercising a dog to try to make it calm is futile and limited benefit endeavor. The best approach is both exercise AND teaching the dog to be conditioned to be calm through training)-Wanting to be your dog's best friend before having become his leader. (Trying to create a heathy relationship through love, play, and friendship without first creating respect, rules, and boundaries is a first-class ticket to problem dog city! First impressions are as important to dogs as they are to people, and trying to fix negative first impressions is just as formidable)-Thinking dogs just want to please you. (Like all the rest of us, dogs want to please themselves first and foremost. If you’ll look hard enough you’ll see the benefit for them in whatever they’re doing to please you. Understanding this is essential to living well with dogs)-Not sharing valuable consequences for bad behavior. (The most common way owners allow negative behaviors to continue and flourish! It is only through clear, valuable consequences for their choices and actions that dog behavior changes and improves)-Being afraid that consequences and discipline will ruin your relationship. (A common misconception. The truth is, the exact opposite; you’ll create a much healthier, respectful, balanced, and enjoyable relationship by sharing clear boundaries and rules consistently. Your dog will be happier and enjoy you far more if you’ll be a good leader)-Letting love blind you to your dog's actual needs. (So many of us are so desperate to connect and love and nurture that we’ll forgo sharing what actually makes our dogs happy, balanced, and comfortable. This is a selfish act, based on our needs, not our dogs.)-Letting your needs blind you to your dog's actual needs. (So many of us struggle to connect, feel safe, engage in love within the human world, or are just overwhelmed, overworked and lean on our dogs for love, support, nurturing, in a world where we aren’t able to receive the same support and nurturing from our own kind. When our dogs represent so much more than just being our dogs, it can become next to impossible to share the leadership, discipline, structure, rules, and accountability they need to thrive)Of course there's always more, but this is a pretty good place to start to get a better handle on you and your dog’s relationship. And if you’re having any issues, chances are awfully good that you’ll find the cause right here in this post.

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogMarch 3, 2016

The Slippery Slope

By Sean O'SheaOne of the greatest challenges for dog owners post-training is fighting...the slippery slope.Your dog comes back to you and he's like a new guy. He's well-mannered, he doesn't do the old stuff that drove you crazy, his commands are spot-on, and he's just kinda amazing overall. You rejoice!But then the slippery slope slips up on you. The slippery slope is all about the slow, almost unnoticeable return to regular life. The slow return of old habit patterns. The loss of focus. Perhaps taking the easy (or lazy!) route instead of doing what you know you should. And especially letting little, teeny, tiny moments - the ones that seem totally inconsequential - get away from you. This is how all the great work you paid for starts to come undone. Drip by drip. Teeny moment missed by teeny moment missed.It almost never happens in some big and obvious fashion. That would be easy to see and address (and most of us wouldn't let ourselves off the hook for the easy and obvious). But because all these moments seem so small, innocuous, and are maybe even hard to see, we start to slip.And so slowly, drip by drip you start to lose that new and awesome dog you got back.Owners slip back into real life and are distracted. Owners are amazed that their dog is SO much better that they allow some little things because the good-to-bad ratio is so improved. Owners haven't been educated on how important the small moments are and how to effectively address them. Owners aren't truly prepared to change their habits and lifestyle. Owners feel bad about the rules, structure, accountability. It's a ton of work.But here's the thing, the way your trainer made all this crazy progress, the way they delivered you a totally new and improved dog, was precisely through addressing all the small moments and understanding how valuable they are. By not being distracted when the dog was out with them. By focusing and addressing issues the moment they occurred. By seeing what your dog was capable of and continually asking for more, rather than less. By not feeling bad about sharing the stuff that makes your dog feel more comfortable, happy, safe, and fun to be around. And by being willing to do the work. Lots of it.I get it, it's hard. Really hard. Especially if you have the luxury of owning a dog who leans more to the troubled side of life. But like everything else in life, there are no shortcuts. No cheating. Not if you want the good stuff.The good news is, the slippery slope can totally be avoided. With some new disciplines and some mental shifts you can totally keep the awesome dog that came back to you, but it's going to require oodles of work. Like, serious oodles. We always tell our clients that the hard work starts when the the dog goes home. Not that we haven't done our job, we have, but that's easy. It's our job. The real challenge is for everyday people - people who aren't dog trainers, people with tons of other important things going on in their busy lives - to prioritize and make both the mental effort as well as the physical effort to ward off the slippery slope. To do all the necessary stuff to maintain this awesomeness your dog came back with.Like all life stuff, it comes down to how bad you want it? Will you make the time? Will you prioritize the work? Will you maintain focus? Will you train yourself to be a deputy dog trainer? Is it important enough to you? It's like eating right, working out, saving money, doing a great job at work, and maintaining awesome relationships - they all take sacrifice, self-improvement, and continued hard work. But they all also pay off some handsome rewards.

CONNECT WITH US ON Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!Our groundbreaking do-it-yourself E-Collar training video/PDF training guide Learn to Train The Good Dog Way: E-CollarTraining is now available for order! Click HERE to order your copy!

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogFebruary 3, 2016

First Do No Harm

By Sean O'Shea

Ok, so here's an interesting thought. What if even without any actual "training" - meaning all the usual sit, down, place, heel, recall etc., and without any fancy tools - you could still massively impact your dog's behavior and state of mind? What if by simply NOT doing or allowing certain things you could make some great stuff happen?Well, the good news is, half of our success as trainers isn't even in the actual "training" we do. A lot of it is simply in all the stuff we don't do or don't allow.Here's a quick list to help your dog and yourself get to a better space:-Cut back on the unearned affection. Play hard to get. Only reward awesome choices and states of mind - not just existence or demand. Remove the unconscious, incessant petting and stroking. Make your dog work for his/her interactions. Become aware that unearned affection is one of the NUMBER ONE CAUSES for poor behavior. That it often creates wound up, edgy, entitled, bratty, neurotic, dependent, guarding, possessive dogs. And don't forget about heavy-duty separation anxiety.

-Don't allow disrespectful space invasions. This includes jumping on you, pushing you out of the way at thresholds, jumping on your lap uninvited etc. Instead, claim your space by using your body - not to hit or harm - but to have a calm, quiet conversation with your dog that your space is valuable and needs to be respected. For jumping you can do this by placing your knee forward when your dog jumps, so that he gets your knee and not you, and so jumping is not rewarding. At thresholds simply block with your body and then walk confidently INTO your dog's space (and your dog if need be) to move them back. As for jumping on your lap uninvited, simply say "no" and stand up when your dog jumps on you. This will remove him from your space and make this not rewarding. Then remove your dog from the couch. (Bonus points for initially keeping a bubble of space - say 10 feet - around you so your dog works on being more independent and less clingy.)

-Don't allow or reward demanding behavior. If your dog is barking at you for attention, for food, to play, to get access to a door, or to get out of the crate, don't reward the behavior with what the dog is looking for. Say "no" and ignore the behavior. If your dog demands something and you respond you've just taught your dog what works to get what he wants. Be careful not to unconsciously reward/allow this.

-Make your dog wait. Simply make your dog wait at moments of excitement or intensity. This could be feeding time, at thresholds, going in or out of the car etc. By teaching your dog to wait for permission from you you teach impulse control, respect, and to look for permission rather than be on auto-pilot. Conversely, by allowing impulsive behavior you teach your dog to ignore/disrespect you, to be impulsive, and that intensity and excitement gets him what he wants.

-Don't baby, console, pet, nurture, smother nervous, insecure, frightened dogs. This will only make them worse. Instead, treat them like normal dogs by asking more of them, challenging them to get out of their comfort zones, give them a firm human to lean on, not a soft one to feel alone/frightened with. (This is a super hard one for most, due to our desire to nurture and help, but the truth is, this behavior is responsible for creating so many completely dysfunctional dogs.)-Don't lean on your dog emotionally. One of the biggest advantages trainers have is being in an emotionally neutral space when interacting. For many owners, their dogs have become their place of solace in a world they often feel unfulfilled or unsafe in. This neediness presents you in a weak state that will cause pushy dogs to be more pushy and nervous/insecure dogs to become more nervous. For either mindset, the outcome is often the development of protective or aggressive or reactive behavior. By treating your dog like a dog - in the very best and positive sense of the phrase - you'll set you and your dog up to be in a much more balanced space.Once again, this is all the non-"training" stuff you can do that will help your dog's behavior tremendously. Just being aware and acting on these simple recommendations can change things DRAMATICALLY!!So even if you're not going to do any actual obedience work and teach commands, you can still make some MAJOR changes simply by first doing no harm.P.S. Now if you'd like to go even further and make bigger strides, change behavior more significantly, create reliability, and have a deeper, more healthy relationship with your dog, you can visit my website and watch the free do-it-yourself training videos. They're easy to follow and will help you make some amazing stuff happen.www.thegooddog.net

CONNECT WITH US ON Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!Our groundbreaking do-it-yourself E-Collar training video/PDF training guide Learn to Train The Good Dog Way: E-CollarTraining is now available for order! Click HERE to order your copy!

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogJanuary 13, 2016

The Substitute Teacher Syndrome

By Sean O'SheaOk, first off, I know there are some amazing substitute teachers out there, so please no angry comments from those of you who are awesome!That said, I think most of us are familiar with the massive atmosphere shift our classroom would undergo when a substitute teacher would show up when we were in school. There was a palpable sense of relief (relief from the usual demands and accountability of our regular teacher/program), and a corresponding excitement about the perception of "looseness" and cracks in the rules that could be exploited.Now why on earth would a classroom full of the same kids - who just yesterday were respectful, obedient, polite, deferential, and happy to work within the framework of the rules of the classroom - suddenly turn into a bunch of pushy, bratty, opportunistic wild things?It's simple. We're programmed to follow believable leadership and authority, and we're also programmed to ignore and push against non-believable leadership and authority. It's in our survival DNA. It's also in our opportunistic DNA. What can be taken advantage of will be taken advantage of.The regular teacher, who has been doing the gig for years, has a sense of confidence, certainty, no hesitation, and an air of believability. Step over the bounds, act the fool, and surely consequences shall befall you. He or she exudes this vibe, and the children naturally respect it.The substitute teacher on the other hand is a part-timer. He or she is likely far less confident and sure. Not having done this for years and years as his or her main gig, he or she hasn't mastered the fine art of leading...of controlling the room, of being certain, of creating respect by way of presentation and confidence.And it shows. It shows in the hesitation. It shows in the self-doubt. It shows in the trying to make friends rather than establish rules. It shows in the lack of certainty in their words and movements. It shows in the inability to confidently issue consequences. It shows in the overall energy of the substitute - and it's this uncertainty, hesitation, and lack of confident energy the kids see. And it's what makes the the sub vulnerable.The kids see it, and the kids eat it up. They prey on it. And why shouldn't they? If you're not able to be a believable leader, you have to expect pushback. That's the law of the jungle. Uncertain leaders get led.And it's the same with our dogs. We've all heard about the dog behaving brilliantly with the trainer and then abominably with the owner the next moment. It's the exact same thing. The trainer is the experienced teacher. Confident, certain, not hesitating, sure of what to do and when and exactly how to do it. That confidence and certainty is obvious to the dog, and like the kids in the classroom, he or she tends to comply nicely, and most importantly, offers their best work and best selves. Like magic.The owner on the other hand smacks of the substitute teacher. They're part-timers. They're uncertain about the commands, the mechanics, the timing, the sharing of consequences etc. And of course, all this uncertainty and lack of confidence is super apparent to the dog. And so he or she naturally takes advantage of what can be taken advantage of, offering far less than their best work or their best selves.It's the substitute teacher syndrome.So if you're looking to get your dog and your relationship back into a great space, you gotta get out of the substitute teacher zone. You've gotta become the real deal. The experienced, certain, confident teacher/leader that naturally - by way of what you've earned, learned and cultivated - causes your dog to behave differently. There are no shortcuts to this. Just ask the substitute teacher. You only get the awesome classroom (and the awesome dog) by putting in the continuous hard work to become the awesome leader, the certain leader, the confident leader, the believable leader.Lots of practice and hard work is the only gateway to this promised land.

CONNECT WITH US ON Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube for more training insights, tips, our free weekly Q&A Saturday, and community interaction!Our groundbreaking do-it-yourself E-Collar training video/PDF training guide Learn to Train The Good Dog Way: E-CollarTraining is now available for order! Click HERE to order your copy!

CLICK THE PICTURE BELOW TO WATCH THE DVD TEASER!

thegooddoglifeblogDecember 29, 2015